Uggg potty training

We are still working on potty training.  She goes when she wants to and that is good, but the cost is killing me. I found the perfect cloth trainers one size. Got to get the moneyand then it's a go.

Needing to better myself

Things i need to do

1. Quit smoking. You think it would be easy, but when you have done something for 10+ years it is going to be hard to quit. I have a good reason to quit. My daughter she needs to have her mom around and i also don't want her to pick it up.  I can breath when i am not smoking and i am not hacking a lung. I don't smell.I want to be able to run and play with my child, she deserves that. I have made it a month, but i crave every day. I get through my cravings with food. Good but not so good. Which brings me to number 2.

 2. Losing weight.  I have to find a way with my young child to accomplish this.  She will only walk so far and ride so long in stroller. Like i said above that while i am smoking free i am eating more. Carrots and celery are good, but not what i want to eat.  Please comment if you have any ideas. I also need some workout ideas for at home with low budget and that my child can "do" with me. She is very much into helping and coping mommy.

Potty training

Potty training stinks. While she thinks it's"fun" to go the next day she will refuse. I don't want to push her to soon, but financially I need to. I can't afford the 30-40 a month on diapers. We try to go potty on the big girl potty as much as we can while wearing a diaper, but doesn't always work. If you can do cloth diapers one size fits all. In long run it will save tons of money and if your lucky enough to have a second child that's even more money.

Support group that saved my life

If you have ever experienced P.R.O.M. (premature rupture of membrane) or know someone that has i highly recommend this site.
http://www.inkan.se/pprom/


Your health care team may know little about PROM and may tell you that your baby’s chance for survival is so grim that it isn’t worth trying to save him or her. Although we don’t know the specifics of your situation, there are many stories on this website of babies who have survived despite PROM. Know that miracles happen.
Our second message is:
Follow your instincts.
If something doesn’t feel or sound right, ask for a clarification or an explanation. Ask more than once. Even if you think you understand the information, allow extra time for it to sink in, and to act on what you are told.
PROM is a pregnancy crisis and the shock of this trauma may make it difficult for you to think and express yourself clearly, absorb new information, and – most importantly – make decisions. Don’t feel pressured to make any decision immediately, and don’t just “go along” with what your health care team is recommending if you aren’t completely sure that it’s right for you and your family.
Be your baby’s advocate with your obstetrician or health care provider.
PROM can leave you feeling completely helpless. However, you may find empowerment in the fact that you are your baby’s advocate. Be as active as you can in the decision-making process. If you are uncomfortable making requests or asking for another opinion, remind yourself that you are doing this for your baby, and that your baby’s health is the most important thing.

• Keep asking questions if you don’t understand something or don’t have all the information you need. Wait until you feel that you have all the information you need before you make a decision. Unless your health care team tells you that your health or safety are in immediate danger, don’t make decisions quickly or hastily.
• Don’t worry that you are being a pest by asking the hospital staff to monitor you closely.
• Insist on being seen any time you feel that something is not right, even if you have left the hospital. If your health care practitioner will not schedule an appointment, go to the emergency room.
• To the extent possible, keep a written log of what you are told, by whom, and the date and time you received the information. A written log is also useful for keeping track of your medications, fluid intake, bathroom visits, and pad changes (if applicable), as well as the names of the members of your health care team.
• Join the PROM list for support as you advocate for your baby.

Seriously this site is great. There are tons of people to talk to. Also   http://www.facebook.com/groups/pprom/ or http://www.facebook.com/groups/152248884816945/  But like i have said before these sites may not be for you. You have to be comfortable with your group.

 If your not sure if you have experienced prom try this site http://www.aafp.org/afp/2006/0215/p659.html

P.R.O.M

http://stillstandingmag.com/2012/12/what-do-we-create-from-our-pain/
      I read this today and it brought tears to my eyes. You should never feel alone after a loss. I have a support group that is my life line. We don't just talk of our losses we talk of our triumphs. But that's what we needed. We all grew close and consider ourselves sisters now a chunk of us started the struggle of child loss at the same time.
      It takes time to find the right group. In my case i didn't know what happened and didn't fully understand. It took a few months after my loss to find the group.
       I am all about telling people about P.R.O.M. because 6 years ago it was not as common. My doctor didn't even know what was happening in my small town. She got a packet from me. lol. Premature Rupture of Membranes. For me that meant leaking fluid at 16 weeks until i got infection and had to deliver my perfect child at 6months 6day. It all happened so fast and with a blink of an eye she was gone. I think that's why i make it my mission to spread the word so women can get the support they need before something happens.

one in heaven and one on earth.

     Well really i am a mother of 2. My first little one is an angle in heaven. She was born much to early and her little body couldn't hold on. I struggle with the loss. Some days good, some bad. I have learned to handle my pain. No matter what i acknowledge my angels life and celebrate it, but i also take time to mourn. It is what works for me. Don't press is down deep or it will sneak up on you.  Talk about her often.   I am now blessed with a happy healthy little girl (i will call hope) who is everything to me. 
    Growing up i always planned on having lots of kids and even offered to be a surrogate for someone when i was much younger. God had different plans for me. Before my 21st birthday i became a mother only to have her slip away before she was a day old. 
     I love Hope she is 2 now, but late at night like this i begin to feel guilty that she will be an only child. I was raised with a large family and had the joy of having someone to always play with. I have thought about looking into a surrogate and adoption, but being at the bottom of middle class that is not an option. I guess i should explain why she will be an only child. The most important reason is that i have been told my next birth will probably kill me and the baby. So no more kids. Hope is great with kids she loves to help with the babies and even takes care of her "baby". She is just a loving child. 
    My fear is smothering her by trying to make up for it. Right now we are potty training and that is fun. HA!  She does all right but some days she just plain refuses to go. She is getting good with animals and sounds. Can count to five, loves to sing and dance, and doesn't want anything to do with the alphabet. 
    I am blessed she is not a picky eater she will eat an onion like an apple. Her veggies are always first on her plate to go, then starch, then meat. She is not a big meat eater.